Let Them Be What They Are

I had an interesting conversation yesterday while at Katherine's Bible School concert and it stuck with me. I was watching the concert with Caroline sitting beside me and I was trying to manage Ben, who would only be still when he had a lollypop (I gave him 3 over the course of the event). Ben was just being himself, examining everything, running around, laying down on the bench and the floor and in general perfectly normal for him. I admit, I was embarassed, because I know most people don't know he has autism, they simply would think I have no control over my own child. A man and his wife had a little red haired baby and they sat next to me during this whole ordeal, clapping for their own children as they got up to sing. As the concert ended, I ended up following them with K, B and C over to the reception area and I tapped him on his shoulder and thanked him for being so understanding about Ben's distractions. He smiled and said in a thick accent, "I have six children of my own and I know that sometimes you just have let them be who they are. " So my mission is to support Ben in being who he is. He's not a cookie cutter kid, as he gets older it is becoming very obvious that he is not a "typical" three and half year old. He may never be a "typical" person, but then again, who wants to be just typical?

Looking Forward to Our Trip

Thanks goodness for the Wiggles. I think Ben will be glad to start school again on July 5th, as I'm sure he's getting bored. I know I am. I've still got to clean the house and he's developed an affection for our potted plants and of course, the ever popular throwing hard objects down on the wood floor to hear the cool sound they make. I have a lot of books on my reading list, some about educating autistic children, but I'm finding it hard to make the time to do any significant work with Ben. I'm so glad he's still getting therapy and will be in school again soon, I think it's definitely the best thing for all of us. I am going to take him to a Bible school concert tonight that Katherine is going to be in and I'm not looking forward to it. Rob has to work late and can't be there, and Ben's hard to control in public places. I intend to bring a lot of lollypops. The kid's going to have no teeth by the time he's ten.

And We're Off to A Rocky Start. . .

I wish I could say that the last couple of days were terrific for Ben but they haven't been. He's been okay out in public but at home he's been driving me crazy. He's stimming a lot, and now that he isn't as interested in books, he's got nothing to do but get in trouble if I'm not personally engaging him in some activity, which let's face it, doesn't happen as often as it should. I don't want this to be a complaining blog, but I must rant a bit. He spins the stools in our kitchen all the time. He has started chewing wood again, and when he's not gnawing on our coffee table, the windowsills, the bannister, the dining room table, he is scraping his fingernails in it. He climbs on me all the time and squeezes my arms. He has gotten fussier when it comes to eating. He used to love goldfish, cheerios, and wheat thins, now he just crumbles them up and spreads the crumbs all over the floor and then wants more to do the same thing again and has a tantrum if I don't do it. I get so tired of telling him NO all the time that I'll admit there are sometimes I just give up. Playing outside didn't go so well today, as neither the girls or Ben wanted to stay out there. Finally, I just came in and in order to quell a tantrum, I just put on the Wiggles for him. I'm just so worn out and I don't know why. Maybe my next post will be better.

We Had a Good Weekend

Ben had an awesome day yesterday! He was as good as gold at the festival we went to and definitely deserved the "baby of the day" award. He beat Katherine and Caroline hands down for good behavior. I don't know if it's the oils or not, but he's been making awesome eye contact too. Today at the mall, while we were eating our lunch, everytime I looked at him he was looking back at me smiling. He's always happy when he's eating. Rob worries that he's going to get fat. Ben didn't say much today as usual, but I though I caught the word juice this morning and he definitely said cookie at dinner, while eating one. His rash is totally gone now, and for the most part, his bowels are normal . . for him, anyway. I think it may have been caused by the NDF Plus, I'll give it to him again when we get back from Europe. He gobbled down his gluten free rice pasta at dinner tonight, at least that's one more thing I can give him when he goes on "THE DIET" .

Testing . . .

I shipped out the first test of Ben's today to the lab. I have a whole bunch of tests sitting in our living room, some blood, one urine, one fecal (yeah, I know, gross) and I have to collect the samples one by one and send them off for analysis. I gave Ben his first enzyme tablets today at breakfast and he took them readily. I guess they must taste pretty good. One is supposed to help with digesting the casein/gluten proteins and the other is supposed to help digest starches. No big changes in Ben in the past couple of days, but he's been pretty happy except for a tantrum last night at bedtime. He had started sort of singing Chugga chugga big red car, which is the song from the Wiggles that Ben loves. So I thought I'd encourage him and I started singing it too. But he got angry and threw a fit because he then thought that I would put on the Wiggles video for him, but it was time for bed. I stopped giving him the NDF celation drops because he had a wicked rash on his bottom the day before yesterday, and I didn't know why. It was on the back of his legs too, so I thought it must be an allergy to something. I still gave him the primrose oil yesterday, but did not do the drops or the cod oil. His rash is better, so I'll reintroduce the cod oil today and tomorrow and then try the NDF again in a few days. His poor little body is sure receiving an onslaught of new things.

Ben's Life First Post

Hi, I've decided to keep this blog for myself, as well as for my family and friends who are interested in how Ben is progressing. I just finished giving him his Super Nu Thera and his Evening Primrose Oil. Last night (day two of giving him the Primrose and Cod Liver Oil) Rob was surprised to find Ben actually obeyed his instructions to put a basketball in the hoop at our neighbor's house. The first time Rob asked him. Usually he seems to have no idea what we're talking about so I'll take this as a hopeful sign. His eye contact did seem to be better too. We went to see Dr. Hines in Winston Salem on Saturday and she gave us a whole bunch of things to start. In addition to the Oils, which are fatty acids to help brain function and hopefully stimulate speech, we are going to give him enzymes at meals, and we started chelation with a mild product called NDF Plus. Of course, we are also going to start him on the gluten free, casein free diet, but not until we get back from our trip in early July. The doctor agreed with the chelation part even though he hasn't been tested for mercury levels yet, because the chelator is a non drug one that anyone can take. We believe that mercury may very well be one of Ben's issues. I have over eight metal fillings in my mouth (8 is the point where they start to worry) and I most likely swallowed one while I was pregnant with Ben and Caroline. Silver fillings give off a mercury vapor. It's possible that Ben's vaccines contained thermerisol, a preservative that contains mercury, especially since the military stockpiles vaccines and who knows how old Ben's were. I also ate a lot of tuna while pregnant, probably twice a week. All these could have increased Ben's levels so both Rob and I think chelation might benefit Ben. Of course Ben is going to be allergy tested, mercury tested, metal tested, etc, etc. And he'll be getting B-12 shots every three days. Poor little guy. I don't know if all this will work, but I feel that as a parent, I have to at least try them.